Finding Adda

I have a love for a good coffee. 

An oatmilk latte is my favorite.  No syrups needed, but if there’s a house syrup that lightly sweetens the drink without taking away from the taste of the specially roasted bean. . . It’s probably going to be a winner.

 My love of coffee is no secret if you know me or follow me on Instagram.  It brings joy to a morning of errand running or gets me through the afternoon after a busy day.  It opens doors to have coffee dates with Jon or even catching up with a friend in between the business of the week.  My husband is quite partial to drinking his out of ceramic cup and not rushing around.  I could go either way (because Target calls, right?).   Over in the social media world, Carlos Whittaker recently posted about how he was starting to take more time to slow down and enjoy his coffee, after a trip to Italy, where he noticed even coffee shops and gas stations served espresso in ceramic cups and people enjoyed their coffee sitting either in the quiet of their own thoughts or in the company of a good friend. 

I one hundred percent believe that coffee brings connection.  Last month, my husband traveled to Pittsburg, Pa for work, and visited a local shop called Adda (Ironically, they serve our favorite coffee from our side of the country!).  While, his coffee experiences in Pittsburg were slightly disappointing (we’re spoiled here in CA!), the story behind this Adda coffeehouse did stand out.  Adda, is the Bengali word for bringing people together to engage in the fine art of conversation.  It is not only a noun, but a verb. . . It is the actual conversation as well as the place in which the connection takes place. 

 Isn’t that beautiful?  In high school, I had the opportunity to spend a month in Norway, meeting family and learning about my heritage.  One of my favorite observations, was how every afternoon, everyone stopped what they were doing for coffee and treats.  A few years later, on a trip to El Salvador, one of my most favorite memories, was sitting around talking because the whole town shut down for an hour or so each afternoon!  A siesta!  It was funny, how we always wanted to walk and get coke in a bag or a papusa when everything was closed! 

How different life is here, stateside.  We rush around, filling our planners with plans from sunup to sundown.  We are ragged and worn down and lonely.  We struggle with slowing down and just sitting to enjoy that cup of handcrafted espresso with a good book or with a good friend.  Jennie Allen recently shared some staggering research in her book, Find Your People, that is heart breaking.  This research shows that 3 out of 5 people are chronically lonely, and that number is growing.  And loneliness is just the beginning. . . anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts are all rising with it at a rate that is worse for our health than the usual obesity, smoking, and inactivity. 

Ouch!  That was painful to type. It is a heartbreaking statistic. 

It’s comfortable in our homes, away from people.  And as that pandemic seems to still be trying to hold on tight, we have made isolation an acceptable thing.  We’ve gotten comfortable avoiding people, but deep down inside we are craving connection.  We desire to be heard and seen, to laugh and cry . . . or maybe both at the same time.  We are made to connect with others, and not just from behind a screen. The Bible is very clear from the beginning of creation that, “man is not meant to be alone.” While that verse in Genesis refers to Adam being alone and the creation of Eve, we really aren’t meant to be alone. Period.  God, our creator even desires connection between us and Him.   

It’s time to find our way back to Adda, to connecting with others. Maybe Adda takes place in a coffee shop or a local restaurant.  Or maybe its Stok cold brew and E.L. Fudges and goldfish crackers (are those still a thing?) in the backyard while the kids play.  Let’s stop loneliness in its tracks and create space for others in our lives.  Let’s be courageous and take the first step and invite someone into our lives, our space.  Let’s sign up for a Bible Study or a women's event.  Let’s look at our schedules and start breaking the chain of loneliness.  Push through the uncomfortable act of sending the text and you won't regret it!